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05:20 am: Excuse me, I have a question for you
This does not mean a question is coming. Teddy means "I want to tell you something." As in "Excuse me, I have a question for you. A friend at summer camp was at home and the roof fell in and he was stuck but then he disappeared and there was a big fire and..." (which in turn translates to a camper with either a tragic past or a vivid imagination).

I'm going to try to get him to say "I want to tell you something" instead. While everyone who knows him knows there will be no question forthcoming, those who don't know him are perpetually baffled.

I believe I've succeeded in switching Teddy from "what the devil" as an exclamation to "what the heck." I'm not entirely sure why I prefer the latter, but I do.

"I'm sorry. Did I do it on purpose? I don't know." This is another one that he surely must have picked up somewhere, but I don't know where and it annoys the bejeebers out of me. Completely undercuts the apology.

On the other hand, he says it clearly, which is more than I can say for his old, inarticulate, bashful apologies.


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