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06:08 am: Look at me! I want to show you something! Watch me do something!
Over. And over. And over again.

What Teddy wants to show me - every. single. time. - is his face in the water. "I'm swimming underwater!"

He's so thrilled with his accomplishment that I don't have the heart to tell him that he is not, in fact, swimming underwater. Still, happily and repeatedly immersing his face is an accomplishment.

I'm struggling again with balancing being a good parent and being a good me. Teddy wants my attention. He's proud of overcoming an obstacle. He's conquered his fear of getting his face wet. I'm proud of him. I cherish the time we have together, which seemed like such a good solution: Peter gets time alone, I get time to exercise, Teddy gets time with Mommy. Win-win-win!

And yet this incessant clamoring for attention is disrupting my own workout, which I need very badly. So I try to watch pretty closely and make the unending acknowledgments while huffing and puffing, but he admonishes me "Stop moving! Stop moving please!"

He seems to truly believe that "please" is magic, that it will make all his wishes come true. I feel so mean saying "I understand that you want me to stop, and I'm very excited about your swimming, but I really need to keep exercising," not because it's a mean thing to say - I think it's pretty nice, under the circumstances - but because he's so disappointed.

Oh well. No one said parenting was going to be easy.

Current Location: Longmeadow
Current Mood: tiredtired
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