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07:00 pm: Happy Birthday to Me
My birthday started great. I woke up (I was not wakened by anyone else), rolled over, and had a slow, leisurely visual tour of my son's sleeping face -- his little nose, his closed eyes, his peaceful mouth, the dried blood on his ear.

When Teddy woke up, he nursed briefly and then went straight for his new truck. I hadn't let him open it the night before (he was too tired), but he sure remembered it first thing. He vroomed and wheeeed to the accompaniment of a canine cacophony from a neighboring apartment complex.

I had vicious cramps, so I wanted a long, hot bath to relax. It was hot, anyway (Teddy wouldn't tolerate Absent Mama for long). And Peter got me Czech donuts for breakfast, which was very thoughtful. Our family time together was lovely.

My in-laws are also lovely, but apparently were embarrassed that they didn't have a gift for me (as if I needed more stuff to haul home again), so they didn't say happy birthday or have a card or anything. I felt so... adolescent and left out and unloved.

We had a traditional Czech lunch of fried, breaded pork, potato salad, and pickles (no one asked me; in my family, the birthday person always got to choose all the meals, and there's nothing like a birthday away from home to make a 43-year-old woman want everything the way her family always did it, dammit). Teddy would only eat the pickles and some canned peas (so much for all-organic). There wasn't a birthday cake (waaaaaa!), but I don't think he would've eaten that either. He was Little Mr. Fussy Britches about eating for the entire trip.

After lunch was when the emotional fit hit the shan. Peter offered to take Teddy out with his family so I could get some private time. They would be gone an hour or so, so maybe I could even get a nap (precioussssss napsssss). Cool!

His mother stayed home to do our laundry, which was kind of embarrassing. It turns out they don't have clothes dryers (almost nobody has them). So my panties were draped over two different apartments (MIL's and SIL's). Greeeeat. Peter absolutely did not understand why I found this embarrassing. They don't have the phrase "don't air your dirty laundry" in Czech. Besides, it was clean laundry and everyone does it and blah blah blah.

But still: my panties. Two apartments. Crap crap crap.

So anyway, I couldn't sleep. Instead, I opted for DVDs and knitting. After two episodes of Lois and Clark, I was thinking "heh heh... cool! An hour and a half of TV! Without interruptions! I haven't done that in over a year!"

After a third episode, I was wondering where everyone was. Teddy and my FIL returned during the 4th episode (they'd been gone nearly 3 hours). No Peter.

"Peter shopping," my FIL tells me. OK. We needed a few more groceries. Maybe he's getting something for my birthday. He should be back in a few minutes. He walks so fast that I'm surprised he didn't beat my FIL home.

When he still wasn't back after 4 hours, I was convinced he'd been in an accident. How could I make sure he got good care? How good IS the care in Eastern Europe? How would I talk to the medical team? I DON'T SPEAK CZECH! What would Teddy do without his Daddy?

When he finally strolled in, Peter did not understand why I was upset. He'd stopped to visit a friend (who wasn't there, so I don't know what the heck took so long). He left me alone, with cramps, on my birthday, for the entire afternoon, with no clue where he'd gone or how to reach him, with no ability to talk to ANYONE, and he didn't understand why I was upset.

I went for a walk by myself. I knew that my plan to take the train back to Prague, fly home, and start divorce proceedings was irrational, so I figured a little fresh air (coal-scented though it may be) might help.

When I returned, Teddy (whom Peter had left alone with his parents while he looked for and didn't find me within sight of the apartment) wanted to leave. Right. NOW. It was the start of his bye-bye ritual (repeated at least daily thereafter): he got his sweater and his jacket, my jacket and my shoes, saying "bye bye bye bye" the whole time.

So the three of us went out. Just as well, as I didn't want to do the screaming fishwife routine at Peter in front of his parents.

When we returned, we had leftover goulash for dinner.

Current Location: NMNM
Current Mood: bitchyvery bad -- & sorry for myself
Current Music: Happy Birthday (I hate that song)


[User Picture]
Date:May 1st, 2006 04:51 pm (UTC)


So sorry you had such a yucky birthday. Cramps - missing family members for long periods of time, no nap, panties everywhere, and worst of all, no cake. At least it will be one you will never forget (as much as you may try!)
[User Picture]
Date:May 1st, 2006 06:02 pm (UTC)

Re: Sorry!

lol! excellent point.

And it totally eclipsed my old worst birthday, when I got filing cabinets for my sweet 16.
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